


I Want To Make You Feel Beautiful

by burymeinziam



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-08
Updated: 2013-01-08
Packaged: 2017-11-24 05:09:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/630774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/burymeinziam/pseuds/burymeinziam
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry didn’t know what to say. He felt like he should have known. He felt like he should have done something because he should be able to read Louis like a book. He felt like he shouldn’t have assumed Louis was fine because nobody can be that strong all the time. Nobody should have to shoulder all the burden.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Want To Make You Feel Beautiful

Louis groans into Harry’s mouth as his back presses into the front door, slamming it shut after the pair stumble into Harry’s spacious apartment. Harry hooks his arms beneath the shorter boy’s knees, hoisting him into the air causing Louis to break the kiss and gasp in surprise as he wraps his legs around Harry’s waist. 

They’re still dripping wet from the rain and as Harry looks into Louis’ eyes he can’t really believe that he got this boy to come home with him, that he has someone so special – and so very _his –_ pressed against his front door with their legs wrapped around his waist. Grinning, Louis rests his head back against the door, never breaking contact with the beautiful green eyes that he’s grown to love so much. At the sight of the rain slicked skin of Louis’ neck, Harry can’t help but to lean forward and attach his lips to that spot just below Louis’ earlobe causing older lad to groan and entwine his fingers into Harry’s luscious brown curls. 

**_ Harry sat across from Louis in a near empty coffee shop drumming his fingers against the fake wood of their table as he watched Louis scratch words into his notebook. Occasionally, Louis would glance up from the page to catch Harry staring and he would furrow his brow (in annoyance or confusion, Harry  didn't  know) before returning his attention to the notebook.  _ **

**_ Harry just wanted to know what he was writing. He wanted to know what was so important that Louis  couldn't  drop the pen and have a conversation with him. _ **

Louis’ slightly parted lips curve upward into a smile as he drags his fingers down from Harry’s hair,  over his sides and back up, his fingers sliding beneath the damp material of Harry’s water sodden t-shirt so he can remove the piece of clothing from his body. 

Harry detaches his lips from Louis’ neck and presses a quick, sloppy kiss to his lips before helping his boyfriend with the shirt. Once it drops to the floor, his lips are back on Louis’, this time with a bit more ferocity, causing Louis to open his mouth  allowing Harry’s tongue to slide along his bottom lip and into his mouth. 

**_ “What are you writing?” Harry asked growing more and more eager to know what Louis was scribbling into that notebook as the seconds ticked past. He’d been writing for nearly thirty minutes now and he  hadn't  yet said one word.  _ **

**_ Louis glanced up from his notebook making note of Harry’s curious expression. His blue eyes flicked down toward the words scratched into the page in front of him before moving back up to meet Harry’s.  _ **

**_ “Feelings,” Louis answered simply. _ **

**_ Harry nodded, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. He was beginning to grow a little concerned about how brief and secretive Louis was being about everything. It was so unlike him; Louis usually told him everything. They’d promised each other they’d never keep secrets and Harry was starting to think that Louis was going back on his word.  _ **

**_ “What kind of feelings?” Harry urged. _ **

**_ Louis opened his mouth, came close to answering Harry’s question, but decided against it at the last second. He met Harry’s inquisitive and worried gaze and shook his head as he turned his attention back to his notebook.  _ **

**_ “It  doesn't  matter.”  _ **

A small, barely audible moan escapes Louis as Harry’s lips trail down from the corner of his mouth to his jaw line. The older boy relishes in the way Harry’s long fingers tangle within his hair and the way the curly haired boy groans when Louis’  head falls into the crook of his long, pale neck to allow his teeth to sink into tender spot where it meets his shoulder.

Harry presses his body further into Louis’ trying to close off all possible space that can worm its way between them. Louis whispers something profane that Harry can’t quite make out but  doesn't  really need him to repeat because he gets it. He feels just as good as Louis does and they haven’t even  _done_ anything yet. He could stand there against the front door forever and just press and touch and feel and be perfectly happy, but he also knows that what comes after is going to be so much better and he almost can’t wait. 

“Bed,” Harry pants into Louis’ hair.

Louis lifts his head so he can see Harry properly with half lidded eyes and slightly parted lips and Harry can’t help but to think that Louis has never looked more beautiful than when he is this drunk off of pleasure. 

“Yeah,” Louis whispers, nodding slightly. “Bed.”

**_ “Do you come here often?” Harry found himself asking as he propped his head up with his pal. “To write, I mean.” He’d been sitting in that coffee shop for what felt like hours watching Louis scratch words he couldn’t read into that notebook. Granted, Louis  hadn't  forced him to stay – he  hadn't  even invited Harry to get coffee with him, Harry had just run into him there – but he was growing bored and he at least expected Louis to pay him some kind of attention.  _ **

**_ Louis glanced up and eyed Harry with those clear crystal blue eyes that never failed to set Harry’s skin on fire. “I don’t know. Should I come here often?” _ **

**_  Harry swallowed a breath of air and shrugged his shoulders. He was half expecting Louis to drop his pen and close that notebook of his. Maybe scoot his chair a little closer to Harry’s and wrap an arm around his shoulders because he just knows how embarrassed Harry gets when it comes to public displays of affection. _ **

**_ But Harry also knew that this was just Louis trying to change the subject so he could avoid having to endure the impending and, more than likely inevitable, conversation that their small talk has been leading up to. Harry knew all of this, but he  wasn't  sure how to tell Louis that he was on to this flirtatious little game he was trying to play without making things worse so Harry just kept his mouth shut and tried to ignore the blush that he knew was flooding his cheeks.  _ **

**_ “No,” Louis said with a small, apprehensive laugh. “I don’t come here often.” _ **

It’s almost graceful, the way they tumble onto Harry’s queen sized bed. He can hear Louis giggling from beneath him, his body shaking from the laughter, and all Harry can do is smile because Louis  hasn't  seemed this happy in ages. 

All laughter ceases, however, when Harry straddles Louis’ hips and slides his hands under Louis’ shirt causing the blue eyed boy to gasp out in surprise when he feels fingers brush past his nipples. He shivers beneath Harry’s touch as his eyes fall shut and he’s just breathing and drinking in the way Harry is dragging his strong hands all over his entire being.  The younger boy leaning forward to cover Louis’ body with his own and attaching those sinful, puffy pink lips to Louis’ tan neck, rocking their hips and breathing hot air onto the older lad’s spit slicked skin. 

**_ “Do you write a lot?” _ **

**_ Louis shakes his head, reaching up to rub at the back of his neck as he stares down at the half filled page he’d been working on. “Just on occasion.” _ **

**_ “Do you always write about your feelings?” Harry asked. He only wanted to know more. He thought he knew Louis inside out, like the back of his hand, and here he was finding out that his boyfriend has a secret journal containing all the things he felt he  couldn't  voice to Harry. It made him wonder if his own name was in that book; if Louis was harboring feelings of resentment or disappointment that he felt he could never share.  _ **

**_ Louis nodded, chewing on his bottom lip as he lifted his gaze to meet Harry’s. His eyes told Harry just how nervous he was. He wanted to reach across the table and take hold of Louis’ hand and tell him that it was okay, he could tell him anything and nothing would ever change; Harry would always love him just as much.  _ **

**_ “Yeah,” Louis finally answered. “One feeling in particular though.” _ **

His breath grows more and more labored as Harry inches Louis’ pants down his legs, pressing his lips to every bit of newly exposed skin. Louis’ eyes are still pressed shut just because he can’t force himself to keep them open for more than a few seconds at a time. 

It’s something amazing and wonderful and  _new_ . It’s never been like this for them before. Whenever they have a spare moment alone they’re usually forced to resort to quick fucks in a hotel room while their band mates are hanging out in the rooms across the hall. They’re usually afraid of the prospect of getting caught and while that could be arousing at times, the connection  they've  both been longing to make has never been quite right.

But this time, this is different. There’s something in the way Louis is squeezing his eyes shut and digging his fingers into the skin of Harry’s back silently begging the younger boy for more that lets Harry know that Louis is feeling more than just the press of his lips against his inner thigh.            

This is them appreciating each other. This is Harry reminding Louis that he is t _here._ This is Louis telling Harry that he knows and that he trusts him. 

Once Louis is completely bare, Harry drapes himself over the smaller, tanned body beneath him and presses their lips together in a kiss that isn’t so much rough and needy as it was a reminder that he’s here and that Louis doesn’t have to worry about him going anywhere.

Louis’ hands fumble for Harry’s belt buckle and soon the green-eyed boy is kicking his jeans off and groaning into a naked shoulder as Louis palms him through his briefs. 

“God, I love you.”

**_ Harry read Louis’ words over and over unable to believe that Louis could think such things about himself. That he was selfish and a liar; that Harry resented him.  _ **

**_ “You don’t really feel this way do you?” Harry asked, his eyes scanning the pages over and over. “You can’t honestly believe that people hate you; that I hate you.” _ **

**_ Louis shrugged, eyes trained on the faux wood of the table. _ **

**_ And Harry’s heart broke because in Louis’ eyes he saw nothing but shame. _ **

A whimper slips past Louis’ lips and into Harry’s mouth as he settles himself between Louis’ legs. Their lips break apart with a lewd pop and Louis locks his legs around Harry’s waist looking at him with the widest blue eyes the younger boy has ever seen.  

“Ready?” Harry asks as he leans forward and presses a gentle kiss to Louis’ jaw as he brushes the hair away from those blue eyes and Harry really can’t believe he had the pleasure of knowing, let alone loving, someone so breathtakingly beautiful.

Louis nods, this small blissful smile gracing his gorgeous face, and then Harry is pressing through that tight ring of muscle. The older boy’s mouth falls open allowing a tight, strangled moan to push past his lips. 

**_ “It’s not true,” Harry said.  _ **

**_ Louis looked up, his eyes dark. “It’s kind of hard to believe that when everyone says the opposite. They say I’m a liar, that I’m hurting you by pretending to be something that I’m not. And it’s true; all of it. I am lying and I am hurting you and I am being selfish because you could be doing the same thing and you’re not. You’re so beautiful and brave and good, Harry, and I’m… I’m not.” _ **

**_ “No,” Harry responded. It was all he could do not to cry because he’d never seen Louis so completely and utterly broken. “No. That’s not true, not one bit of it. People just… they don’t understand. You’re not selfish, Louis, not at all.  You’re braver than I could ever be. You’re putting yourself in the line of fire just so we can continue to go on stage and live out our dreams; you’re sacrificing. I think the whole Eleanor thing sucks, and yeah, it hurts sometimes but I know you wish we could walk outside hand in hand just as much as I do and I also know it kills you that we can’t. And that’s enough; knowing that you’d do all of that for me is enough. ” _ **

**_ Harry reached across the table and took hold of one of Louis’ hands, rubbing his thumb over his knuckles. “It’s not true, Louis,” he whispered. “None of it.” _ **

**_ Louis offered Harry a weak smile in return and shook his head. “  You're  so beautiful, Harry. Sometimes I  don't  even think I deserve you.” _ **

Harry has to force himself to swallow a moan as the sheer warmth of Louis surrounding him takes over, filling him with complete and utter bliss. Louis is reaching up, his nails digging into Harry’s forearms as the younger lad sets up a slow, steady rhythm, leaning forward to press a sloppy kiss to Louis’ lips as he does so.

Harry can’t help the small groan that fills Louis’ mouth as the boy beneath him arches his back and forces Harry in just a little deeper. His rhythm falters slightly as the pleasure sears through his veins, but then Louis’ heels are digging into his ass and the grip on his forearms grows a little bit tighter and Louis is panting “faster” into his ear and Harry can’t do anything but grunt out a quick “okay” and rock his hips a little quicker than before.

**_ Harry  didn't  know what to say. He felt like he should have known. He felt like he should have done something because he should be able to read Louis like a book. He felt like he  shouldn't  have assumed Louis was fine because nobody can be that strong all the time. Nobody should have to shoulder all the burden.  _ **

**_ Harry felt like he should have been there and he wasn’t.  _ **

**_ Looking across the table, he had never seen Louis so ruined, never seen him so tired and defeated. He drew in a deep breath and gave Louis’ hand a gentle squeeze before standing up from the table.  _ **

**_ “ C'mon ,” he said. “Let’s go.” _ **

“Oh, fuck,” Louis gasps, his eyes rolling into the back of his head as Harry pushes him further into the bed. His hands slip from Harry’s forearms to grip onto the sheets. Harry watches, tightening his hold onto Louis’ hips and drinking in the sight of the beautiful boy completely falling apart beneath him. It’s rare that Louis lets go like this. He’s usually so focused on maintaining some sense of control in all aspects of his life but now, in this moment, Louis is free and focused on nothing but f _eeling_ , and it’s the most beautiful thing Harry has ever seen in his life. 

Harry buries his face in the crook of Louis’ neck, biting down on his bottom lip in order to keep himself from ending things too soon. He wants to stay this way forever; sheathed inside Louis and hearing nothing but his pleas for him to ‘”don’t stop” or to “keep going; just like that.”  

But then Louis’ panting out that he’s close and urging Harry to go faster and harder and  _please_ and Harry has no other choice than to oblige because this is all for Louis. When Harry looks down Louis’ knuckles have gone white he’s gripping the sheets so hard, and then the blue-eyed boy is coming, his cries are silent and his eyes are shut tight and Harry  can't  help but to follow suit because Louis is clenching down all around him and he really can’t take much more than that. 

**_ “Where are we going?” Louis asked as Harry dragged him down the empty sidewalk just outside the equally vacant coffee shop. He was surprised there  weren't  more people outside, but then he was also glad because the lack of recognition made him feel normal. But it was also raining and he was already soaked to the bone because Harry had literally pulled him outside and  he'd  forgotten to grab his umbrella. _ **

**_ Harry stopped walking for a brief moment and smiled at Louis in way he  hadn't  in while as he reached up to push a damp curl out of his face. “I want to make you feel beautiful.”  _ **

It  isn't  until  they're  lying, spent on the bed and Louis is tucked safely away into Harry’s side that he says it. Harry’s eyes feel heavy, but he stays awake anyways because he wants to live in this moment with Louis for as long as he can. He knows how much it means and how little time they have to just  _be_ and he knows Louis needs it.

He cranes his neck to look down at Louis who is staring up at him with eyes that exude gratitude and Harry’s heart swells. “I love you,” he whispers. 

Louis nods and lifts his head to kiss the corner of Harry’s mouth before pressing himself a little closer. “I feel beautiful,” Louis murmurs into the salty sweet skin of Harry’s neck. “You make me feel beautiful.” 


End file.
